billy_slasher (billy_slasher) wrote in shoutingwithin,

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I HATE least, i wish i could

I hate how you got over what happened so fast and I'm still stuck in it. Who cares if it was, like, three summers ago. We used to be BEST FRIENDS! How could stupid shit like HAPPEN! And you still have no fucking least, thats how u try to make it seem. I know you still feel it! I told you everything......EVERYTHING. You werethe ONLY person i have EVER trusted. Then that dumb closet and- poof! we can't even see eachother anymore. Now it's forced and I hate it. I hate that althouur not around i love you SO much. Seeing you with ur girlfriend is unexplainable. I'm ok with it because ur happy...but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt. 3 years we've been trying to pick up the peices...or at least i have, maybe ur attempt was just for show...but I know i should let this go...and i really wish i could. But i can't. When i told u how i felt and u silently put me down....that just...I don't know. Now everythings messed up and you say ur worried about me doing drugs and stuff and that u don't want to see me messing up my life. NO! you messed it up. And when that stupid fuck nearly raped me, i ran back to u, like a dumbass, and u could care less.....I hate you soooo why are u the only one i wanna be with?
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